Saturday, May 2, 2015

WeWriWa - May 3, 2015 - Missi Wanderin' in the Woods

Welcome back to this week's eight sentence snippet from my forthcoming memoir from Missi Wanderin' in the Woods! Let's see how Charlie, the soldier who had just sought help for PTSD symptoms only to be escorted out of Mental Health by Military Police and told not to come back. 

“Just so long as we’re clear,” the smaller officer snorted as they turned to go.
            Charlie stiffened. “Excuse me?” Both MPs froze, their backs to us, as my husband with the dreamy dimples continued, his already loud voice now a bellow. “You two may be Military Police, but I am still your senior NCO, so turn around and stand at attention for God’s sake!”

Wind gone from their sails, the Private First Class and Corporal slowly turned. “I appreciate your doing your job, but you will conform to military standards when addressing your senior NCO. Is that clear?”

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10 comments:

  1. Very military-like of the officer. Loved the dialogue exchange1

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    1. Thank you Frank! I still remember the feeling of wanting to melt into a puddle as they bantered back and forth, each careful not to cross the invisible line that only they could see LOL

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  2. Good for him, I say. He needs to be shown the respect he deserves. Another excellent excerpt.

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  3. Wow...what a scene. The MPs were dismissive and condescending. I like the way you included "dreamy dimples" into the scene, Sara. It was a perfectly timed interruption, a reminder that he's more than just the angry soldier in that moment.

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    1. Thank you for noticing, Teresa! <3 I can't wait for you to read it in its entirety!!

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  4. Nice response from Charlie--loud, yet restraining himself to stick strictly to protocol and rank.

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    1. Thank you, Ed! Isn't that the underlying tune in the military? Restraint and conformity? It certainly was in this episode :-D

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  5. Attention and I mean it. Love the snippet after years of being a military wife.

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